Family

My family is complicated. I have wonderful loving relationships with my children. We had our challenges when they were growing up but we made it through and treat each other with love and respect.

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I am in the process of divorce with their father after 30 years of marriage. It is amicable and my children support the decision. The marriage was not easy and I will be processing the damage it did to me through my work and with a therapist. 

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I struggle with combing the difficulties I have endured with my love for my children into one subject of work labeled 'Family.' But I feel like I have to. I spent decades separating different aspects of my life into categories. I separated my family into good and bad. I put all my effort into protecting my children from the bad. But my children are adults now. They are defining their own versions of family and no longer require my intense protection.

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It is time for me to reconcile the good and the bad. It doesn't mean I will develop relationships with those who cause me harm. It means I am no longer in survive and protect mode and have the space to make peace within myself.

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This work will change as I make progress.